The Thanksgiving That Almost Never Was
Posted by HiTechRedneckNov 26
18 months ago I came within seconds of taking my own life. I had lost my job, my family, my freedoms; I was at rock bottom. I remember feeling like I had nothing. That sense of emptiness was so scary. I wasn’t even mad – Just alone. But a random phone call from an old friend came at the exact right moment in time. I remember the taste of the cold barrel in my mouth and hearing the ringing of the phone. I can’t believe how close I came to leaving this World.
So today, on this Thanksgiving I have so much to be thankful for. I’m blessed with the best children a father could hope for; two wonderful kids who love me despite my flaws, who look up to me and love me unconditionally. I have two fantastic ex-wives who I remain friends with to this day. I cherish not only the times we use to have together, but the ones we have now as well. I have the most supportive family imaginable. My parents and brothers have watched me trip, stumble and fall and have always been there standing beside me when I need them.
I am also so thankful to you – all my friends old and new who follow me on Twitter, Facebook, this blog and the like. Social Networking has allowed me to chronicle my life – the ups and downs, good times and bad – and I am so thankful that you are there to tag along for the journey; sometimes offering advice or putting a foot in my ass if I need it. I appreciate you putting up with my crazy antics and listening to my wild stories. I can’t imagine what my life would be like without all of you in it.
Most of all I am thankful for my life – for the chance to sit and watch a sunset, or see the twinkle in my son’s eye on a Christmas morning; the ability to get in my truck, put the windows down and feel the wind against my face and know I am alive. I’m thankful for each breath I am blessed to take in this World because late on a Friday night 18 months ago I was a split second away from giving this life up.
3 comments
Comment by niki johnson on November 26, 2009 at 2:34 pm
well awesomesauce you always got my foot in your ass whether you want it there or not…. it is there even when you are pushing it away!!
!!!!!! I am always here for you… only God knows why I am still here for you I guess I like the challenge lol but I will be the last one to give up on you!!!! xoxo!!!
Comment by Chris Grever on November 27, 2009 at 11:31 am
Russ, I had no idea that you came so close to the end… I’m very thankful that you didn’t not though and you are still hear to enjoy what God has to offer. Sometimes we get so lost in our pain that its had to see the light at the end of the tunnel or see others that need us but just know that this world would be lost with out the famous Russ Crowe! Thank you for sharing your intimate moments with us and the world, you never know that you could help someone out there in the same situation. <3
Comment by mojackson on December 1, 2009 at 1:23 pm
I really felt this one. I think everyone reaches their Ground Zero. Not to make light of 9/11, but sometimes it takes planes in the building to reconnect you to what’s real. This past year I’ve had extreme highs and the lowest lows. The lows force you to seek the most basic form of “religion”, “belief” or “faith”. Climbing back out of the muck, you can see people for who they really are. Material things lose value and goals and aspirations become black and white. You learn through these experiences, to tell the real people in your life how you feel about them and you cut so-called friends totally off. Life is not complicated. The journey is a bitch though. I think the key to it all is enjoying the journey, the ride. I’m going to continue to ride this thing out. And I’m glad you chose to do the same. We’re glad to have you on the road with us, brother.